It is my job as a parent to prepare my children to one day take flight and leave the nest. I have really been tested lately and in all honesty I haven't done a very good job. It is really hard to let my children experience life without me being there to put my wing around them and protect them. It is very hard to see them disappointed or upset even if it is the result of something they have done. We can teach our children to not walk out on the icy pond but sometimes they just have to test the ice to see if they can really do it. No matter how many times we say it's dangerous they just have to see how far they can walk. Of course my children haven't been walking on ice here in sunny Georgia, but they have tested the waters lately. I realize that they have to experience things and learn from their mistakes, but it's really hard to watch them stumble and want to go help them up. Did I make bad choices at times in my life? Yes! Did I fail a class in school once? Yes! Did I lie to my parents ever? Yes! Did I have a friend be mean to me and was I mean back to them? Yes! Am I still alive? Yes! Did I turn out to be a good person? I'd like to think so!
My new favorite word is consequence! I have decided that I will warn my children of the consequences related to whatever pond they feel they have to walk out on. I will not continue to nag them but let them experience what will happen if they choose to take a few steps out on to the pond. (of course I wouldn't let them drown!) You don't feel like you need to do your chores? OK, you don't get your allowance. You don't want to do your homework? I don't have to pass math class, you do! No bargaining or negotiating I will not back down. This may seem like a no brainer and I feel silly as I'm writing this, but again it's hard to not give allowance when you know your child is saving up for something special.
Am I writing this in regards to all of my children? Yes and No. Let me just say that being a teenager is way harder than when I was one. Maybe I just don't remember because it was so horrible that I blocked it out!
As she heads off to high school in August she will be faced with a much bigger pond! If I can teach her to take baby steps now and realize what is going on around her maybe she will think twice before just running out to the middle. If she can look around and see where the weak spots are, hopefully she will go a different way. It may not be the easiest but it will be the better way for her. Will I always be at the edge of the pond waiting if she needs to come back? Absolutely! As my mom reminds me ,"You will always be their mom no matter how old they are. You will always worry and want to protect them."
I know that she is not ready for take off yet, but is my job as a parent to let her practice and find out the best way to fly for her. Will she fall or stumble sometimes? Yes! Will she live? Yes! Will I live? Yes!
I don't know what God has planned for any of my children, but I know that he will take care of them when I can't. I can't think of any other I would want to watch out for them!
Jeremiah 29:11 says.....I have it all planned out-plans to take care of you, not to abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. The Message version
No comments:
Post a Comment